Seniors | A Path To Care

24 Apr 2016

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans Posted in Seniors Permalink

A Patients Story

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans On April 24, 2016

Believe me when I say that if having a positive attitude meant good health, I would not be sick. I relied solely on being positive so much at the beginning of my journey when my husband became ill. I paid no attention to my own needs. “Its just a little pain it will go away.” I told myself. When I first started to get symptoms of being unwell. I ignored them and tried to carry on with my hectic days, hoping that the pain and sickness would go away as a result of my determined attitude to get better and push myself.

And what happened?

I ended up pushing myself way too far, getting a lot sicker and doing myself no favors as a result of not admitting that the mind cannot control everything. As well as that, I continued on as my husbands caregiver, never once reaching out for help. Until I was rushed to the hospital with severe pain in my stomach and had to undergo emergency surgery.

I think we need to understand that even the most positive person in the world does not sustain this attitude 100% of the time. Realism must also come into play. Positivity doesn’t mean only thinking of rainbows and unicorns. It doesn’t mean having to always be smiling when your world appears to be crumbling. Instead it means accepting the difficulties that come your way and deciding the best way to get through them. Part of the acceptance process is to cry about it, to be angry about it and to have occasional pity parties. Ignoring this and just focusing on the positives in your life will not only prevent you from moving on but it will result in you blocking out feelings that at some stage need to be felt. It can even kill you as in Helen’s case.

Positivity is about maintaining hope and truly believing that you’ll come out of this stronger. You do not need to pretend everything is great all of the time. If someone tells you their feelings, respect that and show concern not negating their feelings. Ask for help, find the support you may need. Do not neglect your own health when caring for a loved one. Get enough rest. Make sure you follow up with your own doctor and not ignore any medical issues you may have yourself. You cannot be the sole person to care for another no matter how much you wish to do so. For more information on local services contact Care Pathways, we are here to help and here to listen.

10 Sep 2015

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans Posted in Assisted-suicide bill approved by California, Long Term Care, Orange County, Orange County Senior Programs, Seniors Permalink

Assisted-suicide bill approved by California

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans On September 10, 2015

9/9/2015 Care News

By Sharon Bernstein

The measure, which would allow doctors to prescribe medication to some terminally ill patients to end their lives if taken, passed 43-34 after weeks of hearings and passionate debate.

Under the bill, which was pulled for lack of support in July but reintroduced last month as part of a special legislative session to deal with healthcare issues, two doctors would have to attest that a patient had only six months to live before the medication could be prescribed.

The bill makes it a felony to coerce or trick someone into taking the medication, or to force it on someone. Patients who are not mentally competent would not be allowed to receive a prescription.

It now goes back to the Senate, where it is expected to pass. The legislature is required to pass regular session bills by midnight on Friday, although lawmakers may opt to stay longer to handle special session measures.

As a social worker I am not in agreement of this. I see many issues with persons that are suffering from depression and having an impact on this decision. I saw nothing in this bill where a mental health evaluation is done prior to making this decision.

30 Jul 2015

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans Posted in aging, Long Term Care, Seniors Permalink

The Lessons Learned from Lace Handkerchiefs

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans On July 30, 2015

The Lessons Learned from Lace Handkerchiefs
(In Memory of my Grandmother Mary Walker)

Growing up my grandmother lived with us and our extended family. She inspired, encouraged and loved the grandchildren always teaching us by example. She had polio as an adult and it left her with a limp and one foot that was contracted. But she never let her disability slow her down.

I can remember setting with her when she would come in from the garden with green beans and we would set together and snap them to cook and to can later. The lessons she taught me while doing this chore was one of many life lessons. She would talk to me about the state of affairs in the world, how blessed we were to have our home and food to eat. That we should never turn anyone away without first giving to them a bit of something, be it food, money, advice or a warm hug.

I am very fortunate to have known and learned immeasurable wisdom from my grandmother. During the Depression days, money was in short supply, so my grandmother learned the value of a dollar as well as making do with what you have. And that good things are worth waiting for.

She always carried beautiful lace handkerchiefs and would put coins in the center and tie them up for the grand kids to find as a reward for something we had done well. It’s a memory I will always cherish of my grandmother Mary, yes I was named for her. I wish she had lived a longer life she left us when I was only eleven years old. But the memories live on and as I pass the lace handkerchiefs to my own grand children, I will make sure their are coins inside to remind them of her. MK

21 Jun 2015

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans Posted in aging, Long Term Care, Orange County, Placement, Seniors, Social Services Permalink

It Takes a Community to Care

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans On June 21, 2015

It Takes a Community to Care
(LIFE SAVING MEASURES)

My Mother used to say this when I was a young child growing up, I did not realize at the time how right she was. In those days we had extended families with Aunts, Uncles, cousins and grandparents. The world has changed and so many families are fragmented and alone without the help of other family members to pitch in when an illness happens or a parent needs care. The community of extended families and neighbors was a life saving measure back in those days.

The community we live in now is one of finding solutions for a crisis situation through our local ER’s which has become a catch all for many when answers are needed.
The social workers of the ERs are heroes and many look to them for answers that are tough. You can walk into any ER on any day of the week and see the pain etched on the faces of persons who are looking for Life Support, people who have reached a crisis situation and are in need of life saving measures to help them find solutions for care.

Our unsung heroes who reach out to prevent a full blown code. Colors, numbers, or other designations may follow a code announcement to identify the type of emergency that is occurring in hospitals when life is at stake. There is no code for the Life saving measures that are taken every day by a team in an ER to prevent a fall, a stroke, intervention, services within the community it serves.

The doctors and staff are trained to recognize and respond appropriately when a crisis is in progress. There are countless hours, time and monies spent on Life Saving Measures but not many people understand this in our communities. Life support replaces or supports a failing bodily function. In treatable or curable conditions, life support is used temporarily until the body can resume normal functioning.

And so are the services that Social Workers and medical staff provide to help a patient and family through the crisis of life, information and support for their patients. 365 days a year. It is a privilege to be a part of this community of support as a social worker.

19 May 2015

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans Posted in Long Term Care, Orange County, Placement, Seniors, Uncategorized Permalink

Are You Ready for Help

Sticky Post By Mary Kay Evans On May 19, 2015

Care Pathways

If I were setting in a room with you right now and could hear your story. I would be able to see how caring has affected you and your life.

I would ask you only one question, are you ready for help?

So many caregivers feel that no one else can take of their loved one the way they would. You are right. Someone who is not connected in an emotional way can actually do a better job. They do the labor (the hard work) and than they go home. The caregiver however is home and have the work load 24/7, with no time off. Unless you have a family who may be supportive and help you. I have found that adult children usually do not have good understanding of their are growing older and may need help and some caregivers will not ask the adult child for help. Many times I hear from seniors “my children have their own life, I do not wish to burden them.” In some situations families are estranged from one another. What ever your story, whatever your situation there is help.

Many more caregivers suffer stress, health concerns of their own and never get as far as even seeing a doctor. Although caregivers are a truly diverse group, stress is a common experience to all. For more information contact Care Pathways or your local Area on Aging in your community.